Sunday 27 August 2017

My Mothering Project

For as long as I remember I have always craved for a semblance of order. An order in the way my house was arranged, with everything in it’s place. A carefully planned schedule from the time I woke up till I retired for the day. It made me feel productive. That is till two years back a beautiful hurricane entered my life and forced it apart with the loudest cry of life she could muster.

All resemblance to order was thrown out of the window. Everything I thought I knew about myself was put to test. Motherhood caught me by the reins and turned my world upside down. I yearned for that predictability. I felt comfortable there and being here, I felt like a fish out of water. I tried to bring that order into our lives failing miserably each time and yet coming back even more determined not realizing that this wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. I had to learn to embrace this unpredictability, the unpredictability of life that comes along with a child. The unpredictability of a child whose smiles, tears, play all move like the two extremes of a pendulum. For my own sanity and that of my family’s I had to throw away many of my preconceived notions on discipline, learning and milestones out of the window and accept this world of uncertainty wholeheartedly.

I as a mother am a work in progress. As my daughter grows, so do I. I move few steps forward some days only to find myself a step or two back the next day. But that is the gift of parenting- a gift that keeps giving. A gift of chances even after screwing up, to make up to our children and by extension ourselves. A chance to raise a strong, healthy and contributing member to the society. It isn’t all moonlight and roses. There are times of guilt and anxiety. But if I stop and look closely there are so many beautiful moments that far outweigh the not-so-good times. I just need to be mindful of these moments, recognize them and receive them.

So, this is going to be my mothering project. A record of these moments of clarity, these 'A-ha' moments that brings me closer to my daughter and brings me closer to the mother I want to be to my children. A reminder for the days to come and a memory of the days that went by. Feel free to join me in this long journey of discovery. Join in whenever something works for you and even when something doesn’t. Let’s accept our vulnerabilities for the sake of our children and come out stronger on the other end. We owe it to them and ourselves.

Saturday 12 August 2017

My Top 6 Tips For Language Development




As a child grows, everything in their surrounding contributes to their development, from the sounds they hear to the things they see, and that includes us, their parents. A language rich environment goes a long way in taping into a child’s sensitive period. The sensitive period, or a child’s natural disposition to acquire language starts from birth to the age of 6 years. It is amazing how much a child learns just by listening to the words a few times. You can find them repeating the words, rolling the sounds in their tongue to get the feel of the words till they master them, just like any other skill. So, I am going to share just 6 points on creating an environment that will aid in this development, inshallah.

1. Talk to your child- This starts from day one. When you do something for your child, talk them through it. During a diaper change say, ‘I am going to change your diapers. Let’s put on some lotion. ‘This is a new diaper’ etc. When bathing them say, ‘Let’s take a bath’, ‘Now, let’s wash your hands’, ‘Let’s put some soap on your legs’. When you repeat these phrases and words every time, your child would start to connect them with the action and learn the new words.

2. Do not use baby talk- Use clear and precise words. Do not dumb down things for your child. For example, use the word ‘Biscuit’ instead of ‘Biki’ or ‘Rice’ instead of ‘mummum’.

3. Combine words with action- Association of words with actions helps the child to master the language faster and let’s face it, it is also very entertaining. This involves rhymes and action songs like ‘Head Shoulder Knees and Toes’ or ‘Wheels Of The Bus Go Round’. Using phrases such as ‘Catch the ball’ ‘Run to daddy’ ‘Jump’ etc during a simple game is also a fun way of teaching language.

4. Involve the child in your daily activities- Describe what you do while you are doing it. While cooking have them pull up a chair next to you and tell, ‘I am cutting onion’ ‘Let’s put in some turmeric’ ‘I am switching on the stove’ etc

5. Books and toys- I can’t emphasize how important this is but introduce books from the beginning. Let it be a pleasant experience. You don’t necessarily have to read it word by word but can use your own language and describe the pictures in the book. Allow your children to hold and turn the pages of the book so they feel involved. Children love listening to stories and this introduces lots of new words, grammar and imagination.

6. Learn language through play- While getting toys, try to get those that encourage interaction with the toy. Greater the interaction, more the child learns. Electronic toys with music and lights do not give children much chance to do anything at all. Wooden toys or traditional toys foster the child’s imagination and helps them to decide for themselves what they can do with it.

These are just a few tips I am sharing with you to get started on that sensitive period your child will most probably be on right now. They helped my daughter and I hope it helps you too.