Sunday 10 July 2016

What I Leave Behind



Note- I wrote this the day I was leaving Kuwait but couldn't post it till now.

The bags are packed and the cartons are sealed. I look around and all I see are the bare walls and empty floor. Today is our last day in Kuwait, our home for the last three years. There are so many thoughts and emotions going through my head right now that I have to consciously to keep them in check.
I came here as a new bride full of excitement and a bit nervous about my new life. This was the first house I was to call my own and I fell in love with at first sight! I remember my husband and I going through catalogs, carefully selecting furniture, shopping for things, excited about setting up our home. I also remember sitting one day, studiously labeling all the spice jars, the domestic goddess that I am (so not!)
This was the first place I started my married life in. The first house I brought Amina to and the only house she knows. Every little corner, every piece of furniture holds a memory. As much as I loved my house I never truly realized how important it was to me till we started selling off our things since we are moving countries. Every time something would go, it would leave a lump in my throat just looking at the empty space. It was a constant reminder of the changes that are to come.
Most importantly, it drove home that nothing at all is permanent in this life. I was very comfortable and content in the life Allah had given me. I never thought that we would be facing a big change in our lives in just three years time. But that is the Will of Allah.
And, as much as I would miss our home, I know there is one thing that is within my reach. The memories we made as we built our family. These memories will inshallah remain. And Alhamdulillah I'm glad that I was able to make these memories with my husband and the wonderful people around me. Because this is what is going to stay in the long run. When I look back many years down the lane, I won't be looking at the tangible.  Instead I will be looking at my first day in kuwait, the first eid we spent as a couple, the day I came to know I was pregnant, the day I brought Amina home, the day she took her first steps, and many more. You see at every turn in our life we make little memories here and there. We collect them all in a bag and tuck them in one place. And one day, when we sit down and wish to visit the past, we just have to open the bag and look at all the lovely times .
These memories that we make everyday stay with us. And if it is with the right people the memories are even more beautiful.
Kuwait was very kind with me and I had a wonderful time here. I met some of the best people here, some of whom have become friends for life. And as much as I am sad about leaving, I am also excited about the new life Allah has planned for us, and I can't wait to see it unravel.